25.5.15

jours froids






Il fait des jours de fin d'hiver, il a même reneigé sur les sommets que l'on voit depuis notre chambre. On a du rallumer le chauffage et on a l'impression que le printemps a oublié d'arriver. Les fraises mûrissent mais on dirait que c'est juste mécanique, elles manquent du goût du soleil. Les semaines en solo depuis que mon homme part filmer de longues périodes m'ont un peu épuisées. Patience plus réduite, repas très simplifiés, matinées au calme entre jardin et maison.
Quand je rentre du travail j'oublie complètement mes dossiers, mes réunions prévues, mes rapports à faire et mes budgets à préparer. C'est une chance. Je pars, et j'oublie tout. Le mercredi et les week-end, je suis très peu devant l'ordinateur, vu que j'y passe déjà 8 heures par jour au travail. C'est dingue de se dire qu'on fait de l'écologie et de la conservation de la biodiversité en passant tout ce temps devant des écrans ! j'ai de plus en plus de mal à trouver une vraie logique dans tout ça après 15 ans.
(15 ans, c'est un tournant, un cycle non ?) Ah, l'appel du large, les autres horizons qui se dessinent peu à peu et qui redonnent du sens à ma vision des choses...  comment dire... n'ayons pas peur ! Vivons !!!!


Lately, there was snow on the close mountains around. We did warm up again the house and eat our garden strawberries that were ripen just automatically, not by the sun. Weeks in solo have reduced my patience and willing to make complicated meals. I really tired as my kids wake up so so so early everyday.
When I come back from work, I do forget about all. Meetings to organize, money to find for my programs, schedules and emergencies. It is perhaps on my way back home that the shift operates. And I love it like that. I could not add work time in my family schedule. I just have more and more difficulties to accept that I really act for ecology and biodiversity conservation while sitting 8 hours a day in front of a computer and on telephonic conferences, after 15 years of that work (is 15 years a sort of cycle?). Something is clearly calling me elsewhere. I just need to listen, in order to answer to my biological needs, my energy needs, my vital needs. Let's say, be alive, do not be afraid, let's go...

24.5.15

21/52




 A portrait of my children, each week, in 2015, following Jodi & Else :)


issa: he asked me this morning, to climb to his favorite mountain, the one he can see from his bedroom window. I was so thrilled! We went there during lili's nap, as Louise was there to keep an eye on her. I saw again how this growing boy of mine clearly needs his everyday climbing!

lili: discovering our future garden, full of wild strawberries :) and couch grass :(. She's growing up so fast these days, and decided that she did not need diapers anymore... and it works (all day long)!

I could not find time to come there and share a post or two during this week! Those 2 little of mine wake up so early everyday that my time is precious and I try to manage my solo weeks the best I can, but definitely internet is an option in front of daily chores and organization...



17.5.15

20/52


 A portrait of my children, each week, in 2015, following Jodi & Else :)


issa: my dreamer...
lili: whistle in mouth, the perfect chief :)
Oh I'm wondering if we could be already in June, when daddy will be here on a more regular basis... 


13.5.15

in my garden: May 13th








Retrouver doucement mais tous les jours le chemin du jardin, du potager bien éveillé maintenant, des fleurs qui s'épanouissent partout, voilà les roses, la bourrache, la roquette, le thym, les petits pois. Les premières fraises sont mûres et déjà les pêches s'annoncent nombreuses et précoces. Ma mini serre attend les clés de notre futur jardin pour se vider, ou bien plus de soleil, je ne sais plus trop... Je rêve déjà de ce nouveau jardin, un peu trop sans doute pour cette année où je ne pourrais pas y faire grand chose finalement, vu l'ampleur des travaux à l'intérieur de la maison. Un jardin où je pourrais décider quoi pousse où, ou bien un jardin où la terre me donnera toutes les directions. Aura-t-on des lapins, comme avant ? Il nous faut des pommiers ! Combien de mois ou d'années avant que ce jardin soit notre refuge quotidien pour de bon ? Je rêve de ne plus avoir 55 marches à descendre et 4 portes à ouvrir et fermer, 2 couloirs et 3 pièces à traverser pour atteindre la verdure.
Aujourd'hui j'ai cueilli la fleur de foin, cette douce flouve au parfum enivrant qui parsème la pelouse que j'ai laissée sauvage dans notre maison d'aujourd'hui. Lili m'a tendrement aidée à couper les tiges de flouve avec des ciseaux et je suis fascinée par sa dextérité, je tente de lui faire confiance complètement, mais je m'en voudrais trop de voir un de ses petits doigts abîmés. Un pas en avant, un pas en arrière. 

Back to the garden, nearly everyday, the kitchen garden is awake now, with many flowers, borage, roses, arrugula, thyme, peas. The first strawberries were harvested today by little hands that would harvest even the white ones... The peaches are on their way for summer. My seedlings wait for our new garden to be ours. We've got to wait a little bit more than I was thinking, that I was hoping. A new garden where I could choose how to organize, but I might not have enough time to make it as my dreams would say, because we have so much work to do inside the house...
To day we harvested hay, Anthoxantum odoratum, which is delightful, such a perfume, in the garden, as I let the grass grow and grow. I'll make some soaps with it or bath infusions. Lili really helped me to cut the hay with scissors. I was fascinated as she was so good in cutting, but also very preoccupied (I did not want her fingers to be hurt). What a difficult job to be a mother I do think everyday.


10.5.15

19/52


 A portrait of my children, each week, in 2015, following Jodi & Else :)


issa: how could I cut your long curly hair? I love them so much, as you do.... You're waiting for your daddy to come home this afternoon, those two weeks have been so long for you (and for us) without him...

lili: happy little growing girl. Your determination is above what I could ever imagine for a 2 year's old baby!

5.5.15

a grain of sand









Just no more than a grain of sand, or two, into the wheels of our nest machine. Perhaps a grain of sand from the beach, where we were last saturday. Perhaps the cause of a first infection for issa, the loss of the camera (then found again), the gastroenteritis and the tiredness of two consecutive weeks in solo. I did not find the time to come here, or make portraits for the 18/52 (or just with my second hand phone here). I just have to accept I cannot do it all. I take it slow, to make lili recover, to deal with all the chore and my lack of sleep.

I would just like to spend time with my new hobby, natural dyeing...and find time to take a little nap...
My first linen tea towels that are quite like I imagined them...

Wish you a happy week my friends!

29.4.15

making art








Leur papa est reparti sur les routes pour filmer pour ce nouveau spectacle équestre qui débutera en mai à Lille. Je suis bonne pour deux semaine de maman en solo. Allez, prenons le tout-doux, faisons nous du bien avec de la couleur. Et vous savez quoi ? Il s ne se sont même pas battus avec les pinceaux et ils se sont amusés, wahou!
Peinture spéciale mains sur une toile faite maison... voilà une nouvelle décoration pour la maison !


Their daddy went back on the road, in order to film for this new equestrian show that will begin in May in Lille. I'm good for 2 weeks of solo parenting. Let's take it easy... let's make art! That can sound bizarre but they did not fight with the brushes or the colors, AND they had fun!!!!!
Special handsafe paint on home made canvas. A new decoration for our kitchen!